Going through a divorce is an emotional time that often comes with hard feelings because of the reasons the marriage is ending. If you share children together, you and your ex will still have to deal with each other. This can lead to frustration and negative thoughts.
One thing that you should always remember is that badmouthing your ex, even if it’s out of frustration, can have a negative impact on your children. Because of this, it’s critical that you avoid speaking ill of your ex.
Children feel torn when parents criticize each other
Kids naturally want to love both parents. When one parent speaks poorly about the other, it can make children feel like they have to choose sides. This can lead to confusion, guilt and emotional stress, especially if they feel loyalty to both parents. Children may start to question whether it’s okay to love one parent without betraying the other, which puts them in an unfair and painful position.
Children might internalize the criticism or feel pressured to defend the other parent. In some cases, it can even impact how they see themselves, especially if they share traits with the parent being criticized.
Even private comments can reach little ears
You may think venting to a friend or relative is safe, but word travels fast, especially in close-knit families or small communities. Texts, calls, and casual conversations can easily find their way back to your child, directly or indirectly. That’s why it’s best to treat any conversation about your co-parent as something your child might eventually hear.
It may be beneficial to include terms against badmouthing each other in the parenting plan. Other terms might also be necessary, so consider working with someone who can assist with getting everything together in a way that represents the best interests of the children.